"CLAW" - читать интересную книгу автора (Barry Dave)

Chapter Five BUSINESS COMMUNICATIONS........................................46
Chapter Six GIVING GOOD LUNCH...............................................59
Chapter Seven HOW TO DRESS EXACTLY LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE......................67
Chapter Eight SALES.........................................................72
Chapter Nine HOW TO GO INTO BUSINESS FOR YOURSELF...........................77
Chapter Ten HOW FINANCE WORKS...............................................82
AFTERWORD...................................................................86


INTRODUCTION


YOU AND THIS BOOK

Maybe you're a young graduate looking for his or her first job. Or maybe
you're a veteran employee who'd like to advance up the corporate ladder. Or
maybe you're a Labrador retriever who nosed this book off the coffee table,
and it fell open to this page.

It makes no difference who you are: the important thing is, this book can
show you how to ACHIEVE YOUR CAREER GOALS and WIN THE REWARDS OF SUCCESS such
as CARS and HOUSES and GREAT BIG BOATS where, any time you feel like it, you
press a little button and UNIFORMED SERVANTS FROM SOME DISEASE-RIDDEN FOREIGN
NATION WHERE EVERYBODY IS WRETCHEDLY POOR WHICH IS WHY THEY CAME OVER HERE
bring you PLATES OF LITTLE CRACKERS WITH TOASTED CHEESE ON TOP or, if you
prefer, FALSTON-PURINA DOG TREATS.

TODAY'S BUSINESS CLIMATE

Today's business climate is partly cloudy with highs in the mid-70's.

Ha ha! That is just a sampler of the kind of snappy humor you will find
throughout this book, along with a lot of words printed in capital letters to
keep you from falling asleep. Actually, today's business climate is perfect.
It is a reaction against the violently antibusiness mood that swept the nation
back in the sixties, when the young people of America, except for julie and
David Eisenhower, decided to reject money as a life objective and became
"hippies." They scorned the corporate world, with its sterility, its greed,
its exploitation, its conformity, its Xerox machines that were forever
breaking down. They embarked instead upon a quest for a transcendent
universal consciousness imbued with peace and love, which they sought to
achieve by saying "dude" to members of minority groups and smoking reefers the
size of marine flares.

But gradually these young people realized they were paying a subtle price
for their counterculture lifestyle, in the sense that they were always waking
up in Volkswagen Microbuses with lice in their hair. So they decided that,
hey, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to become a sterile conforming greedy
exploiter after all, so they went to work for large corporations. Soon they
developed children and houses and Volvos, and within a few years they had