"Asprin, Robert - Myth 09 - M.Y.T.H Inc. In Action" - читать интересную книгу автора (Asprin Robert)

"Suit yourself," I shrugs, not really expectin' a response, as at that moment he faints, mostly because I have just broken his arm... For safety sake, mind you. (for the squeamish readers, I will hasten to clarify that this is a clean break as opposed to the messier co MPound variety, and that it probably wouldn't have put the sergeant out if he hadn't been woozy already from the clout I have just laid on him. As I have noted before, controlled violence is my specialty... And I'm very good at it.)

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO..."

These last words come from Corporal Whittle who has come alive far too late and tries to intervene after the dance is already Done. The inco MPlete nature of his question is due to the fact that, as he is steppin' forward, he runs in to a high swing from Nunzio's elbow goin' in the opposite direction, which effectively stretches him out on his back and turns his lights out... And also stops his annoyin' prattle. For the record, this is what the earlier exchange between Nunzio and me was all about... My makin' sure he was in position and willin' to cover my back while I dealt with the sergeant.

There is a moment's silence, then someone in the ranks lets out a low, surprised whistle, which seems to cue everyone to put in their two cents worth.

"Wow!"

"Nice goin', Swatter!!"

"'Bout time someone taught him to..,"

Hy Flie down nudgin' the corporal's nappin' form with his toe. "They Don't look so big lying down, do they, Swatter?" he grins, like he took the two of 'em out all by himself.

"AT EASE! ALL OF YOUSE" I bellows, cuttin' the discussion off short, " If you touch that man again, Hy, you and I are gonna go a couple rounds. YOU UNNERSTAND ME??"

He looks surprised and hurt, but nods his agreement.

"I can't hear you!!!"

"Yes, Sar... I mean, Guido."

"THAT GOES FOR THE REST OF YOUSE TOO!" I SNARLS. "I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU KICKIN' EITHER OF THESE TWO, OR MAKIN' FUN OF THEM UNLESS YOU'RE WILLIN' TO DO THE SAME THING WHEN THEY'RE AWAKE AND ABLE TO HIT BACK. DO I MAKE MY SELF CLEAR??"

"YES, Guido."

As might be noticed in my manner, I am a bit annoyed at this point, but mostly with my self. I am genuinely irked that I was unable to squelch the sergeant's move without havin' to break his arm, and am quite willin' to take my anger out on the crew. If my speech pattern when addressin' my colleagues seems uncharacteristic, it is because I discovered quickly that the army's non-coms have a point... It is the easiest way to shout at an entire formation at the same time.

"Okay, now LISTEN UP!! As Actin' Squad Leader, I am the rankin' individual present until such time as the sergeant and corporal regain consciousness. I want one volunteer to get a medic for these two, while the REST OF US CONTINUE WITH THE TRAININ' EXERCISE!!"

This strikes me as the logical course to follow, as I am not eager to lo se a day's trainin' whilst waitin' for our non-coms to wake up. At this point, however, I notice my cousin has raised his hand politely for my attention.

"Yes, Nunzio? Are you volunteerin' to go for a medic?"

"Not really, Acting Squad Leader Guido, sir," he sez, sarcastic-like. "I was just thinking that, before you assumed command, it might be wise for you to check in with the officer over there who is the ranking individual present."

Now, as youse will recall, when I pulled this gag on the Sergeant, it was a ploy to divert his attention. I've played dragon Poker with Nunzio though, and I can tell when he's bluffin'... And this time he wasn't. With a sinkin' feelin' in my stomach, I turn to look in the direction he is pointin'. Sure enough, there is an officer there, the first I have seen outside of our lectures. What is worse, he is comin' our way with a real grim look on his face.

"Stand easy, Guido."

I switch from attention to at ease, which is not to say I am at ea se at all. I have been summoned to the Officer's Tent, which is not surprisin' as it is obvious I am gonna take some kinda flack for the afternoon's skirmish. What does take me off guard is that Sergeant Smiley is there as well, sportin' a sling for his arm and a deadpan expression.

"Sergeant Smiley here has given me his version of what's been going on with your training group that led up to the event I witnessed this afternoon. Would you like to tell me your side of the story?"

"I'm sure the sergeant's account is co MPlete and accurate... Sir," I sez, crisp- like. normally, I would have just clammed up until I had a lawyer, but so far no charges have been mentioned, and I somehow Don't think this is a good time to make waves.

"Very well," the officer nods. "In that case I feel co MPelled to follow the sergeant's recommendation in this case."