"Robert Rankin - Waiting for Godalming" - читать интересную книгу автора (Robert Rankin)

"What games do you know?"
I made the face of thought, and pretty damn well too. "There's
Cribbage, Blackjack, Patience, Parliament, Chase the Ace,
Rummy, Chemmy, Piquet, Strip Poker, Stud Poker, Seven Card
Stud Poker, Bridge, Whist, Old Maid, Happy Families, Three Card
Brag, Smiling Faces, Pontoon, Batter My Old Brown Dog in a
Basket, Snap, and Snip Snap Snorum."
"What about six card walkabout?"
"Yes, there's six card walkabout. Strip Jack naked. Boil my brains
in a barrelful of bran, Cock the snoot at the Cockney cowboy,
Bury my heart at Wounded Knee and Kick butt west of the
Pennines."
"You're just making these up now, aren't you?"
"Have been for quite some time, actually."
"So how do you play Kick butt west of the Pennines?"
"With aces wild and one-eyed Jacks worth double if you put one
on top of a black ten or nine."
"Very much the same as Batter my old brown dog in a basket,
then?"
"Same rules apply," says I. "Do you want me to continue?"
"Have you any more real card games on offer? Or are you just
going to carry on making up ones with foolish names?"
"Just carry on, I suppose."
"Continue then."
"There's Hamper the Scotsman. Whoosh goes a wimple. Cover
the rabbit. Body Chemistry 4 ..."
"Body Chemistry 4?" says Fangio. "Surely that's a 1994 movie
starring former Playboy playmate Shannon Tweed. The one
where she has it away with a character called Simon on top of a
pool table."
"Well, you can play cards on top of a pool table, can't you?"
"Not if someone's having it away."
"No, you're right. Forget about Body Chemistry 4. There's Round
my hat with a pigeon on a string, Beat the bad boy Berty, Jump
around Shorty and Set 'em up Joe ..."
"You sure know your card games, buddy."
"Listen, Fange," says I, "in my business, knowing your card
games can mean the difference between getting it up on a cold
winter's night, or getting them down in a Dormobile. If you know
what I mean, and I'm sure that you do."
"I know where you're coming from there," says Fange, and who
was I to doubt him?
We paused for a moment and chewed some more fat.
"That was good," said Fange.
"What, the fat?"
"No, the toot. That was a good bit of toot we just talked there. A
first class piece of toot."
"Glad that you enjoyed it. Do you want me to make up a few
more card games?"
"No," said Fangio, shaking his jowls. "The secret lies in knowing