"Robert Rankin - Waiting for Godalming" - читать интересную книгу автора (Robert Rankin)

"Do you insult the chef before your soup is served? The chef he
spit in your soup, I'll wager. I not care to dine with you."
"Eh?" said Cormerant. "What?"
"Look at this poor soul," said Stravino, pointing to the captain in
the chair. "This man is my friend, but by the caprice of fate, he
has all but lost an ear. Think what might befall the man who
hurries up his barber."
"I think perhaps I'll come back another day."
"No no," said the Greek. "I'm all done now." And he wiped away
the shaving foam and dusted down the Velocette and hummed a
tune and smacked his lips and then said, "What do you think?"
Captain Drayton stared at his reflection. His stare became a gawp
and his gawp became a slack-jawed horror-struck stare. Of his
hair little remained but for an unruly topknot.
"But," went the captain, "but ..."
"But?" asked Stravino.
"But," the captain went once more, "you said a Ramуn Navarro.
Ramуn Navarro doesn't have his hair cut like that."
"He does if he comes in here," said Stravino. "Two and sixpence
please."

Cormerant declined the offer to become the next in the barber's
chair. He left the establishment in a fluster and a hurry. He
dropped his bowler hat and he tripped upon the outstretched feet
of Icarus Smith and fell down on the floor amongst the clippings
and the fluff. Icarus helped him up and dusted him off and
opened the door and all. Cormerant hailed a passing cab and
Cormerant was gone.
Icarus Smith did not have a Tony Curtis that day. He left
Stravino's only moments after the departure of Cormerant. Some
might say, when the coast was clear. But then some might say
anything.
Some might for instance say that it was yet another caprice of
fate that Mr Cormerant tripped. And some might say that his
watch and his wallet fell into the hands of Icarus Smith by
accident. And some might say that Icarus took up the black
briefcase that Mr Cormerant had inadvertently left behind in the
confusion in order to run after him and return it. Along with the
wallet and the watch of course. And the most distinctive watch
fob.
Some might say any or all of these things.
But then some might say anything.
 2
Icarus Smith took an early lunch at the Station Hotel. It is
popularly agreed that there is no such thing as a free lunch. But
Icarus did not pay for his. The barman, who now wore a most
distinctive watch fob, gave Icarus a double helping of mashed
potatoes and told him that everything was "on the house".
An understanding existed between Icarus and the barman. The
bar and grill of the Station Hotel was a study in scarlet. The