"Christopher Moore - The Stupidest Angel" - читать интересную книгу автора (Moore Christopher)

where a half acre of tarmac was corralled off for the Christmas-tree
lot. Upon spotting her car, three middle-aged guys in canvas aprons
quickstepped their way into the store, threw the bolt, and turned the
"Open" sign to CLOSED.


She'd thought this might happen, but she wanted to surprise Theo,
prove that she could handle getting the big Christmas tree for the
chapel party. Now these narrow-minded minions of Black & Decker
were foiling her plans for a perfect Christmas. She took a deep
breath and tried to exhale herself into a calm moment as her yoga
teacher had instructed.


Well, she did live in the middle of a pine forest, didn't she? Maybe
she should just go cut a Christmas tree herself.


"Let's just go back to the cabin, guys I have an ax there that will
work."


"Noooooooo!" screamed Ernie as he reached across his damp
friend, threw the latch on the Honda's door, and rolled them both
out of the moving car into a pallet of plastic reindeer.


"Okay, then," Molly said, "you guys take care. I'll just see if I can cut
a tree out of the front yard." She swung around in the parking lot
and headed back home.


***


Slick with sweat, Lena Marquez slid out of her Santa suit like a baby
lizard emerging from a fuzzy red egg. The temperature had risen
into the high seventies before she'd finished her shift at the
Thrifty-Mart, and she was sure she'd probably lost five pounds in
water in the heavy suit. Wearing only her bra and panties, she
padded into the bathroom and jumped on the scale to enjoy the
surprise bonus weight loss. The disk spun and settled on her usual
preshower weight. Perfect for her height, light for her age, but
dammit, she'd fought with her ex, been pounded with ice, rang out
good cheer for the less fortunate, and endured the jolly heat of the
Santa suit for eight hours, she deserved something for her efforts.


She took off her bra and panties and hopped back on the scale. No
discernible difference. Dammit! She sat, peed, wiped, and jumped