"Edward M. Lerner - Settlement" - читать интересную книгу автора (Lerner Edward M)

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Copyright ©2000 by Edward M. Lerner

First published in Analog, January 2001
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Have you ever had a sense ofpresque vu , the feeling that a familiar place or situation isn't quite what it
seems? The dream started like that.

My company integrates websites. We buy web servers, database management systems, e-commerce
packages, and add customer-specific content. I'm not getting rich, but it's a living.

I was in my office—but it wasn'tmy office. My metal desk had been replaced by an expanse of
mahogany; my plain carpet by a hand-knotted Persian over pegged oak planking; my souvenir
trade-show posters by framed oils. The room dwarfed my real office. Across the table, a frowning
presque vu customer leafed through paperwork, scribbling on a legal pad.

“Is there a problem, Mr. Gray?”

“How did the total get so high? It was only an upgrade to my DBMS.”

Leather creaked as I leaned back in my chair. “Only? It's a complicated process, I assure you.” Before
he could formulate a response, I added, “I'm sure we discussed this.”

Gray squirmed in his (cloth-covered) seat. “You mentioned the upgrade itself and an installation fee.
Now these other charges appear.”

“I'm sure we discussed it,” I repeated soothingly. “These are all customary items.”

He fidgeted with the handle of his briefcase. The ID tag held a business card for “Gray & Associates.”
He opened his mouth, then thought better of it.

We reviewed page after verbose page, mostly boilerplate. He questioned the need for most of it, and the
associated charges; I responded glibly, in the most unctuous and condescending of voices. It was poor
sport: my dream self had parried such queries many times before.

“Yes, an upgradeis $200, per line 1022 of the Software Installation Reconciliation Form. Naturally, we
also have the documentation fee of $150 and notary fees of $50.” Of course, I couldn'tdo the work
without completing the necessary papers, there was no benefit to notarizing them, and my receptionist
was a notary. “You'll want a copy of the papers, hence the xerography charge.” At a dollar a page.

More closely resembling his name with each passing second, Gray rallied to ask, “And these ‘Items
Payable In Connection With Transaction?'”