"Craig Shaw Gardner - Cineverse 3 - Revenge of the Fluffy Bunnies" - читать интересную книгу автора (Gardner Craig Shaw)

THE SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA INSTITUTE
OF VERY ADVANCED SCIENCE

"If they can't help us," Edward croaked with another fond look in Delores' direction,
"no one can."

And with that, the Slime Monster kicked down the door.

"Who's that?" an astonished guard yelled through a hole where a moment before the
door, and a fair amount of the surrounding doorway, had stood.

"Pardon us," Edward mumbled as he made his faltering way over to a water fountain
opposite the guard's station. He pressed the fountain's foot pedal with one mud-
encrusted appendage, and drank.
And, as he drank, the mud turned back to slime with astonishing speed. In mere
seconds, Edward was back to his gooey, disgusting self.

"It's the Slirne Monster!" the guard exclaimed. "Sound the alarm! Close down the—
glubl"

"Sorry," Edward remarked as a stream of slime shot from the end of both his arms to
engulf the guard. "But any of those options would be inconvenient."

He turned to Delores, who stared past the monster at the slime-covered guard. Then
again, she considered, how did you relate to someone who shoots sludge for a living?

"Do you like it?" the monster asked, almost pathetically eager.

"Um—" Delores replied, still somewhat overcome by the course of events. "Like
what?"

"My latest work." Edward pointed back to the pile of gray sludge where the
uniformed guard had blubbered only a moment before. "I call it 'Security Guard,
Covered by Slime.'"

"Uh—" Delores answered as truthfully as possible, considering the circumstances,
"this is all a little new to me."

"Oh, dear, I've worried about this so." Edward fretted. "Isn't my work accessible
enough? Now, now, don't tell me. It's the title, isn't it? It lacks that certain ambiguity
so important in modern art! I've always been too direct, you know. It's an
occupational hazard, when you're a monster." He paused for an instant, then added,
"Perhaps I should call it something like 'Security Number Thirty-four.' What do you
think?"

Delores didn't know what to say. Most of her wanted to say "LET ME OUT OF
HERE!" She had to admit, there was nothing like a new pile of stinking sludge to
remind her she was being chaperoned by a slime monster—the same monster who, no
matter how polite he appeared, was holding her against her will.